Culture Mush

Just when you thought the world couldn’t get any crazier, we get news that some twisted neo-Nazi skinheads were planning on going on a massacre. Their plans were to rob a gun store and invade a predominantly African American school were thwarted when Federal Agents stepped in.

The 2 men (if we can call them that) had planned on killing 88 black people, while decapitating another 14. Their “grand finale” was to end with the assassination of Senator Barack Obama. While the two men didn’t think the final act could be carried out successfully, they seemed more than willing to die trying.

With the Presidential race heating up and racial tension at a peak, most of us can only hope that the election ends on a positive note. Thankfully this plot was squashed before it had legs, but those men had better hope that their newfound cell buddies can look past their distorted beliefs. Something tells me that they won’t have a whole lot of fun carrying out whatever sentence is coming their way…Especially if they are apparent with their beliefs as this guy below!

At this point of the election, I didn’t believe there was a single thing that could shock me anymore. We’ve had people criticizing Obama for his Pastor, his name with Muslim ties (when did being a Muslim all of a sudden mean that you are evil), comments that his wife has made, and just about everything else. We’ve seen fanatic candidate supporters from both sides that haven’t a clue about the candidate they support, and a vice presidential candidate that doesn’t even know what the job of vice president entails…For the record Sarah (may I call you Sarah?), Article I of the Constitution establishes an exceptionally limited role for the Vice President — giving the office holder a vote only when the Senate is “equally divided”: The Vice President of the United States shall be President of the Senate, but shall have no vote, unless they be equally divided.). Can this race to the Whitehouse get any goofier?

Unfortunately, the answer is yes. On Saturday while warming up a crowd in North Carolina, Republican Rep. Robin Hayes offered the some shocking statements. According to Hayes, “liberals hate real Americans that work and achieve and believe in God.”

Of course the Republican spin doctor Amanda Little said that Hayes 100% denies making the comments that appear in the Observer article. She noted that other national reporters that were at the event and didn’t hear anything even remotely similar to what the Observer reported. However, audio has been released from the Robin Hayes speech and he has finally owned up to his comments…but of course, he says he didn’t really mean it.

If you are liberal, have a listen to this and start making all the country bumpkin and redneck jokes that you want. If you are a republican, bow your head in shame and pray tonight for some representatives that can actually do you proud.

In a surprising move that has jolted the Democrats as well as the Republicans, retired general Colin Powell has broken his Republican ties for this election by officially endorsing Barack Obama.  Powell believes that Obama is viewed as a “transformational figure” that the USA needs, and that McCains tone throughout this election is disappointing. While he didn’t note whether it was McCain’s putrid grimaces, his robotic body language throughout the debates, or his sarcastic smirks that flash his corn colored choppers, I am pretty sure that all three of these things added some weight to his decision.

On NBC’s Meet the Press, Powell stated that “I think we need a transformational figure. I think we need a president who is a generational change and that’s why I’m supporting Barack Obama, not out of any lack of respect or admiration for Sen. John McCain.”

Many are saying that Powell’s decision is based on his racial ties to Obama, but he says that it definitely was not a dominant factor in his decision. It turns out that Powell hasn’t had the pants charmed off of him by SNL star Sarah Palin, and that McCain’s strategy of linking Obama to 1960s-era radical William Ayers is not what is needed at a time like this. In his words, “it goes too far.”

I’ve told everybody that listens to my jibber jabber all along, that Colin Powell should have been running for president. Now seeing that he has broken party lines to support the better candidate, further installs my faith in the former Secretary of State and I hope that he will one day run for office. Aside from hearing that the Raiders took it to Brett Favre, this is the best news I’ve heard all day!

Imagine if you have gone through this election only listening to your friends. Imagine getting ready to visit the ballot box and the only thing about the candidates that you know is what you have heard from your friends. Imagine if your friends are completely ignorant, uninformed and uneducated. Let’s have a look at these candidate misinformed supporters and break down the facts according to them.

Extremist McCain supporters:

What they’d like us to know:
- Obama is a Muslim.
- Obama’s not a Christian and this is a Christian nation.
- Obama is a second stringer because he’s not white.
- Obama is a wolf in sheep’s clothing.
- Palin is filled with the Holy Spirit.
- Obama is related to a known terrorist.
- He must support terrorists. “If it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck, it must be a duck.”
- Obama and his wife could be anti “white”.
- They don’t like the fact that Obama thinks “us white people are trash.”
- Obama is a baby killer.
- Difference in opinion is worthy of offensive insults and violent threats.

Extremist Obama supporters:

What they’d like us to know:
- If you’re white and you don’t vote Obama, you’re racist.
- If you believe borders should be closed, you’re racist and not human.
- If you can shout louder than the person you are debating, you are a top notch debater.
- According to the campaign sign that you made, Barack’s name is spelled “Barak”.
- There is no difference between gas and health care. You should pay higher prices for socialized health care than gas. By paying taxes for health care, gas prices will magically plummet.
- Illegal immigrants using health care for free and bankrupting hospitals isn’t a problem. Everybody deserves the same health care rights, regardless of citizen status. If you feel otherwise, you don’t believe in God.
- If you believe health care should only be for citizens, than you think that slavery should still be practiced.
- Immigrants and illegal aliens are all the same. Everybody in the US is an alien. Native Americans also no longer exist.
- If you are passionate about locking US borders and that is your most passionate cause, you should vote for the candidate opposite or your beliefs just because you share the same skin color.

My conclusion after listening to both extreme sides of the coin is that nobody seems to know a damn thing about McCain’s policies and the difference in the issues between the two candidates. Sadly, this election seems to come down to nothing more than race, religion and complete misinformation. Hopefully there are more educated individuals voting, than the ignorant. I’ve also come to the conclusion that the country’s most important issue isn’t raising taxes, high gas prices or abortion… The importance of education needs to come to the forefront in the near future! Nothing good can come of a country full of ignorant individuals with bad tempers, but at least these two very different groups all have 1 thing in common:Tiny IQ’s.

The final Presidential debate is now in progress! If you’re with a group of your friends and you have a couple bottles of hooch, bust out the shot glasses and just follow these rules. It is sure to guarantee a great time, and a rambunctious after-party!

GENERIC RULES THAT SHOULD APPLY TO ANY DEBATE:
TAKE A SHOT:
-When the buzzwords “change” or “maverick” or “hope” are used
-Whenever either one says “fundamental” or “fundamental difference”
-When someone says “I voted for or against” or “He voted for or against”
-When McCain refers to Obama’s “inexperience”
-When McCain stammers and looks like he might have a heart attack
-When McCain somehow works in his personal story as a POW during Vietnam
-When McCain refers to the moderator as “my friend” or the audience as “my friends”
-When Obama somehow works in his personal story of being raised by a single mom and his grandparents
-When Obama makes a smirk, shakes his head, and says, “Look…” as a preface to a statement or follow-up
-When Obama makes the case that McCain and Bush are one and the same or uses the phrase “more of the same”
-When Obama says “John McCain is right on this, but…”
-When either one lays claims to being “bipartisan” or working “across the aisle”
-It’s a Social when Sarah Palin is mentioned!
-Finish whatever you are drinking if McCain loses his temper!

ECONOMY SPECIFIC RULES:
TAKE A SHOT:
-When someone mentions the “Bailout” of Wall Street
-When someone mentions Wall Street and Main Street in the same train of thought
-When someone starts quoting dollar figures (for example: 700 billion)
-When someone talks about mortgages/foreclosures/homeowners

FOREIGN POLICY SPECIFIC RULES:
TAKE A SHOT:
-If anyone uses the words “surge” or “victory”
-When anyone mentions a particular nation as being a potential “nuclear” threat
-When McCain talks about Islamic Radicals/Terrorists
-When Georgia and/or Russia are mentioned
-When Iran and/or Iraq are mentioned
-When Afghanistan is mentioned
-It’s a social for al Qaeda or North Korea!
-Finish whatever you are drinking if anyone delivers specifics on how to get out of Iraq “safely and responsibly”.

Big thanks to Pancakes and Kissing for these rules!